confused and muddled...

[teabagg]

Just recently within the past month, i met a girl and we connected on a deeper level straight away and after about 2 weeks we started seeing eachother. At the time her boyfriend was overseas and she was in the middle of working out a lot of personal issues, we both didn't expect our friendship to become so intense so quickly.
Now her boyfriend is home, she's told me she's in love with me and is thinking of leaving him but she wants to know what i feel. It's only been a month and I do have feelings for her and they are continuing to deepen but i'm scared of getting hurt. I'm also not sure if i can commit to her with the things i plan to do in the future like move to the city, study, play music, travel, explore...I also don't know if i can handle some of her personal issues, they're quite heavy but at the same time i care deeply for her.... I've told her i need time to sort myself out and she understands completely where i'm coming from...

At the moment i just really feel that i need to move on from this town and head to the city but i might leave it to the year after next, i need time to get myself together money wise...

I don't know what i feel and i'm afraid....I was wondering if any of you could offer any insights? I'm 21 in 12 days and i just tend to feel my life is starting to change for the better and i'm not sure if she's apart of that. She does really seem to understand me as a person and our connection is deep, i just don't know...

Do any of you pick up on anything?
Thank you, teabagg

[tk62]

Do what you planned to do and if things are meant to be they will happen regardless, you cannot put your life on hold for maybes, a relationship should outlast change or it is not strong enough in the first place, stop worrying and be up front with her, you are only 21, if she feels she can leave her now boyfriend that should have no bearing on your relationship with her, if she is trying to make a choice between you two, she should do this alone.

[catseyes]

Teabag, IMO if you have to sit and stress over it then its not right. 

[phil52]

 if you are not 100% sure then maybe its not right

[PixxieQueen]

Teabag live for today, enjoy what it has to offer. I have noted in the past as is now you tend to over analyse your situations. You tend to look at the what ifs. This causes turmoil and angst. Enjoy what you have now, make your plans as to what YOU want to do. If anything is meant to happen it will, take each day as it comes. Your are only 21 live and enjoy, don't stress.
"yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is the present therefore it is a gift."
Sending light and peace to you
Pixxi

[teabagg]

I just thought i'd give you an update....

We sat down and had a long talk about our situation, basically we're both at different stages in our lives and her current partner is her family as she doesn't get on with her own. We've decided to stay friends, we both want to be in eachother's lives, it just can't be as lovers....It's good to have sorted things out and even though it was amicable, i'm still saddened by it as we connect on such a deep spiritual\emotional level. If only the time was right...I can certainly see that this way is best though. We both don't regret what happened between us though.
 
I have the worst luck when it comes to relationships! Everytime I begin to like someone it never seems to work out....

[GaryTheDemon]

There's a saying:

Lovers make poor friends, and friends make poor lovers.

While there's always an exception, it's generally true.  Don't worry, lovers will come into your life.  True friends are, in fact, rarer.

[teabagg]

Thanks for the advice Gary, I'm hoping we're an exception?!

When we were talking, we were in the botanic gardens, and these ducks were walking right up to us and everytime we moved to sit in the sun, the ducks followed....there was one small pond around but you never see ducks there! but these ducks were walking right up to my feet. my (now) friend turned to me and said off handedly maybe they're your guides?!

when i got home i looked up Shaman Animal Spirit Guides and looked up ducks.. this is what i found..

Duck's Wisdom Includes:

Grace on water

Water energy

Seeing clearly through emotions

Spirit helper of mystics and seers


Interesting hey? Espectially " seeing clearly through emotions!"

[catseyes]

Thats how they get messages across I believe.  People just don't notice usually!  Blessings T-Bag!

[sabeha]

I have the worst luck when it comes to relationships! Everytime I begin to like someone it never seems to work out....

  WHAT??!!  you're not old enough to have had too many relationships.  you're lucky.  you have the rest of your life to find the right partner.  live!  enjoy life!  when it's time, it will happen.  if you try to make it happen, you'll mess up.  i promise.

if it's not working out, be thankful that you didn't marry this person before it started 'not working out.'  big mistake many, many people make.

i've got more on this, but i won't bore you.  take it easy on yourself.

[Lord Daemon]

Hey folk,

   Teabagg, listen to these people, some great advice. I constantly surprised by the depth of wisdom I find here, and the shallowness of it in the world around me...

Now Gary, I'm not sure about this....

There's a saying:

Lovers make poor friends, and friends make poor lovers.

While there's always an exception, it's generally true.  Don't worry, lovers will come into your life.  True friends are, in fact, rarer.

Gary, I had a friend once, she was a great lover second only to my wife. It can happen! I lived the exception.... oh wait there is that feeling again...

Sorry, basking in my own glory, be back later...

Take Care,

HLD

[GaryTheDemon]

you just proved my point - thanks HLD! 

While theres always an exception .....

he he he ...... love it when you do that.

(as the bishop said to the actress.....)

[Lord Daemon]

Hey Gary,

ROFL!!!! I haven't heard that line for ages! Must remember it!

Take Care,

HLD

[tk62]

Ah Gary, I think you just dated yourself with that line, oh hang on I have also by knowing it, oh well lol

[GaryTheDemon]

I keep telling people I'm old.  I was born old...... you should have seen my wrinkles..... LOL