Author Topic: The Meaning of Headstones  (Read 14651 times)

Offline Christine

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The Meaning of Headstones
« on: June 21, 2005, 06:15:51 PM »
Hi everyone, I thought this might interest you. We walk through cemeteries all the time and look at the headstones. Here is the A-Z of Headstone language.

Anchor
Early Christians used the anchor as a disguised cross, and as a marker to guide the way to secret meeting places. A Christian symbol of hope, it is found as funerary symbolism in the art of the catacombs. Often set amongst rocks. It can also be an occupational symbol in sea-faring areas or the attribute of Saint Nicholas, patron saint of seamen, symbolized hope and steadfastness. An anchor with a broken chain stands for the cessation of life.

Angels
The agent of God, often pointing towards heaven; guardians of the dead, symbolizing spirituality. Angels are shown in all types of poses with different symbolism.
Two angels can be named, and are identified by the objects they carry: Michael, who bears a sword and Gabriel, who is depicted with a horn.

Books
Books remind us that tombstones are documents, bearing vital statistics and epitaphs concerning the deceased. Books may be open, possibly to signify that the stone is a kind of biography, or closed in recognition of the fact that the story of the dead is over.
The book on a tombstone may be The Book or The Bible. This identification can be clinched by the presence of a citation (e.g. John 19:14) or an actual line of scripture. Arabic characters identify the book as the Koran.

Butterfly
The soul. It is symbolic of the resurrection of Christ. The meaning is derived from the three stages of the life of the butterfly-the caterpillar, the chrysalis, and the butterfly. The three stages are symbols of life, death and resurrection. Short-life.

Candle
Candles stand for the spirit or the soul. In Christian contexts, candles can symbolize Jesus Christ, the Light of the World. Catholics often leave candles on the grave to show that prayers have been said for the deceased.

Chains
Medieval thinkers sometimes held that a golden chain bound the soul to the body. Broken links on a headstone can mean the severance and subsequent release of the spirit from the body.
Chains are also the insignia of the International Order of Odd Fellows, so called because of their dedication to giving the poor decent burials. This association can be clinched by the observation of the letters IOOF or FLT (Friendship, Love, Truth) either inside or near the chain.

Chalice
The chalice often appears in association with a white circle representing the consecrated Eucharist. The two items combine to signify the Catholic rite of Holy Communion. The headstones of priests often bear these objects.

Cross
Christianity. Usually mounted on three steps, signifying 'faith, hope and charity'. The most potent symbol of the Christian faith, the cross has been used for religious and ornamental purposes since time immemorial. To the Aztecs it symbolized the god of rain, the Scandinavians set them up as boundary markers, and two buns marked with a cross were found at the ancient Egyptian site of Herculaneum.

Daisy
Innocence of child, Jesus the Infant, youth, the Son of righteousness, gentleness, purity of thought.

Dog
Dogs often appear at the feet of medieval women, signifying the loyalty and inferior place of each in the chivalric order. Modern dogs only imply that the master was worth loving.

Dogwood
Christianity, divine sacrifice, triumph of eternal life, resurrection.

Dove
The little bird appears in both Christian (usually Catholic) and Jewish cemeteries, representing some of the same things and some different things in each. Catholics usually see the dove (which makes its first Biblical appearance in Genesis carrying an olive branch for Noah) as the Holy Spirit. Jews interpret the dove as a peace symbol. The biblical allusion to the dove also suggests a connectedness with the earth and its color, white, represents for Europeans, purity and spirituality.

Dragon
For the Chinese, the dragon is an emblem of Imperial Power, which has brought the universe into its thrall. It also stands for the Universe itself, a chaotic force which none of us can truly master.

Draperies/Curtains
In the days when the body lay in state in the parlour, it was the custom to cover everything in black. Draperies, with their fancy frills and tassels, are more elaborate than a simple shroud. They allow the expression of mourning to linger long after the body has been taken out the front door and the accoutrements have been stowed for the next death in the family.
Curtains can also set the stage. Parted, they reveal a telling excerpt. What is important in such displays is the main actor or central object of the stone.

Heart
Stylized hearts stand for the affection of the living for the dead. Two joined hearts on a stone mark a marriage.

Heart, Sacred
A grisly image unique to Catholic memorial parks. The Sacred Heart depicts the torn and dripping cardiac muscle of Jesus, surrounded, for good measure, with the crown of thorns. The heart represents the suffering of Jesus for our sins. Prayers to the Sacred Heart are said to be efficacious for the release of souls from Purgatory.

Holly
People used to believe that holly bushes protected tombs and other monuments from lightning strikes.

Ivy
Ivy springs up naturally to cover English tombs, but Americans who transplanted it to their graveyards decided that it meant friendship and, like most cemetery plants, also immortality.

Lamb
Usually marks the grave of a child, especially in a Catholic cemetery. The lamb always stands for innocence. Christians go a little further and associate it with the Lamb of God, meaning Jesus.

Lily
Chastity, innocence and purity. A favored funeral flower of the Victorians. Joseph is often depicted holding a lily branch to indicate that his wife Mary was a virgin. In tradition, the first lily sprang forth from the repentant tears of Eve as she went forth from Paradise. The use of lilies at funerals symbolizes the restored innocence of the soul at death.

Lion
Symbolizes the power of God and guards the tomb against evil spirits. Like other guardians, the lion's watch is as eternal as the stone of which it is depicted. The lion also recalls the courage and determination of the souls, which they guard; they manifest the spirit of the departed. Resurrection

Marigold
A large variety, called cempasuchitl, enjoys a special association with Mexico's Day of the Dead; mostly because of its availability in that season. Marigolds not only decorate the graves in the form of crosses and arches, but also form trails to lead the souls of the dead to a home altar set with their favorite foods, photos, and other pleasantries hard to obtain in the afterlife.

Mistletoe
The marvelous ability of this parasite to sustain itself far above the ground lent to the Druidic belief that it was a sacred plant and an ingredient of immortality. The "golden bough" was used in animal sacrifices. The Norse God Balder lost his immortality when he was pierced by a mistletoe-tipped spear.

Oak tree
Hospitality, stability, strength, honor, eternity, endurance, liberty. It is believed to have been the tree from which Jesus Christ's cross was made. In smaller pioneer cemeteries, it is common to place children's graves near oak trees. The oak tree was the tree of life in pre-Christian times. The Druids worshipped the oak. The oak, oak leaves and acorn can stand for power, authority or victory. Often seen on military tombs.

Palm
Spiritual victory, success, eternal peace, a symbol of Christ's victory of death as associated with Easter.

Pine
Intimations of immortality ooze from the very sap of the pine tree. The cone, for example, ensures the perpetuity of life's renewal. Pine boxes were used as coffins in the Wild West, however, simply because the wood was so plentiful.

Rose
Love, beauty, hope, unfailing love, associated with the Virgin Mary, the "rose without thorns." A red rose symbolizes martyrdom and a white rose symbolizes purity and virginity.
Whether the rose is a bud, flower or somewhere in between indicates how old the person was at the time of death:
Just a bud - normally a child 12 or under
Partial bloom - normally a teenager
Full bloom - normally in early/mid twenties. The deceased died in the prime of life
Rosebud, broken - life cut short, usually found with a young person's grave

Scroll
A symbol of life and time. Both ends rolled up indicates a life that is unfolding like a scroll of uncertain length and the past and future hidden. Often held by a hand representing life being recorded by angels. Can also suggest honor and commemoration.

Star of David
Six-pointed star or Star of David, also known as Magen David (Hebrew for shield of David), it is typically used as a symbol of Judaism. The star is actually made of two triangles. It signifies divine protection as epitomized by the alchemistic signs for fire and water, which are an upward and downward apexed triangle. The star is a very ancient symbol, used by several Asia Minor cultures, as well as some Greek city-states. For Judaism, the Star of David came into widespread use at the beginning of the 20th century. Theodore Hertzel, a Jewish activist, adopted the symbol in his writings promoting Palestine as a Jewish homeland.

Torch
Until the church banned such things, most people were buried at night. Torches furnished the light which both allowed the gravediggers to see and the bearers to scare off evil spirits and nocturnal scavengers.
Lit, the torch signifies life -- even eternal life. Extinguished, it stands for death. It can also stand for living memory and eternal life (e.g. an eternal flame).

Wheat
Wheat, like barley, was associated with the Egyptian cult of Osiris. The death of a grain crop is followed, after a period of stillness, by the re-sowing and germination of the seeds. Though no corpses have produced new people, tombstone carvers still employ the ear of wheat as a symbol of rebirth. Convent bakers use wheat flour to make communion wafers, making it a holy plant, of sorts, fit to grace the tombstone of a priest.
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
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Offline Flutterbit

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The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #1 on: September 15, 2005, 12:08:51 AM »
I like butterflies and I like the idea of the mistletoe too but I think all that will be on my gravestone or plaque will be "She's Dead".

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Offline Christine

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Hmmm
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2005, 02:00:25 PM »
Hmmm. I am not sure what I would have, I\'d have to think about it.
The problem with cremations of course is the headstones are alot smaller.

Christine
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
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Offline Flutterbit

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The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2005, 06:25:48 PM »
So steal a page from my book -

Cremated version - feed a rose bush
Un-cremated version - feed several rose bushes!

We buried one of our little dogs in our yard once (she died of cancer) and we planted a rose bush over the grave to commemorate her.  The rose was originally called Tatjana and we renamed it Shadows Rose.  I hate to say it really, because she was very dearly loved but she was the best fertilizer.  The year following her death the flowers on the bush came up about 6 to 7 inches across (they were enormous) and their fragrance was the most amazing I have ever experienced, very strong and yet so distinctly rose.  In spite of the fertilizer remark, it was, I think, a beautiful way to remember someone very special to us.

I have also planted rose bushes in our garden to commemorate all of my Grandparents.  I plan to get around to placing a little plaque at the bottom of each one day but mostly it only matters that I know why they're there.

TTFN
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Offline Miss Lindsay

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #4 on: October 20, 2007, 11:30:50 PM »
I can add a couple more to that:

Broken Pillar:
Looks like vandalism, but these were designed to appear as such. They represent a life cut short. Usually found atop women who died in childbirth or people who died in workplace accidents (eg, firemen killed in fires).

Dollar Signs:
Like $ but with three vertical lines. Not actually a dollar sign but the intertwining letters of I.H.S. Stands for the Greek word for Jesus.

Hands - clasped
Usually appear on graves where partners are buried. It represents one partner reaching down from heaven for the other when it was their time to pass. If you look carefully there is always one hand slightly higher, this usually indicates which of the couple passed first.


Offline phil52

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #5 on: October 20, 2007, 11:54:11 PM »
spike milligans headstone "i told you i was ill"
Why do psychics have doorbells ?

Offline Christine

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #6 on: October 21, 2007, 12:06:57 AM »
lol
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
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Offline tk62

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #7 on: October 21, 2007, 09:45:06 AM »
An unbroken pillar means a life fully lived, usally some one that has died old.
"If our personality survives death, then it is strictly logical or scientific to assume that it retains memory, intellect, other faculties, and knowledge that we acquire on this earth." — Thomas Edison

Offline Neptune

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #8 on: October 21, 2007, 11:04:58 AM »
Personally, and this really is a personal opinion, i cant think of anything worse that having people coming to visit my corpse. I would never want anyone to feel burdened with the notion that a visit to the burial site was required on certain dates or the like. Nope...for me its cremation then scattering. Lady Neptune has indicated that she would like our ashes mixed together and then scattered and that would be about the extent of the after death requirements.
Having said that a memory just popped into my head of a reading i once did.

A gentleman came through and he kept saying that he didn't want to be forgotten. It was a podium reading so there was a large family group present. His wife said that there was an 'issue' going on at home in that she had packed all his trophy's and paraphernalia away in a box and put it in the shed but the daughter-in-law had got it all out and put it back on display so that her kids could get to know their grandfather.

Maybe I'm wrong....maybe something needs to be left behind.

Hmmmmmm 8)
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Offline Lord Daemon

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #9 on: October 21, 2007, 05:04:12 PM »
I want to be either:

a) Stuffed and Mounted: No grave and I can be used as a coat and umbrella rack

b) Flung in some random direction (preferably into the see or a cliff face) from a catapult. This one is purely because I find the mental image of a body being flung from a catapult kind of funny.

c) Cremated and my ashes shot from a canon. Go out with a bang!

I really don't think I need people coming to visit me on the weekends, I won't really say much to them anyway.
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Offline Christine

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #10 on: October 21, 2007, 05:11:07 PM »
lol
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
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Offline Neptune

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #11 on: October 21, 2007, 05:22:23 PM »
How does the old saying go....

' Bury me with my bum sticking out of the ground so you have somewhere to park your bike when you visit ' 8)
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Offline tk62

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #12 on: October 21, 2007, 05:27:54 PM »
It is not you that will need the people to visit, but the people you leave behind that need a place to grieve for you and this sounds very disturbing but it is also a part of the healing ( in as much as one can heal after they have lost someone they love ), to go and leave flowers that they have grown for you or to clean your head stone as they can nor longer touch you, to share the grief with others, to do the many chores that they did for you in your life, to take this away from people is to deny them the release that is required in the process of death, this is why every culture no matter how primitive have had burial rituals. It is for the living not the dead.
"If our personality survives death, then it is strictly logical or scientific to assume that it retains memory, intellect, other faculties, and knowledge that we acquire on this earth." — Thomas Edison

Offline PixxieQueen

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #13 on: October 21, 2007, 05:40:39 PM »
Everything TK said. Also it is a pride thing. I once walked amongst strangers with my loved one, I was so proud. They now rest amongst strangers, I visit the grave  and place flowers, I am still proud and I want the strangers to know my pride.
We cannot change what others think or their actions, but we can change our reaction, that is the choice.

Offline Lord Daemon

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Re: The Meaning of Headstones
« Reply #14 on: October 21, 2007, 05:46:42 PM »
Tk,

Ummm.. I really do understand grief and the grief cycle, grief counselling, etc. It was part of my theology training and it is also part of my work.

You are looking at that from a really limited view. Not every culture does this, ours does to some extent but still then how greatly do we follow this? For some people this is their perceived "need" for healing.

If it is a more that 2-3 times a year event it is in reality dwelling on the person who has passed from this life into the next, and performing "duties" for them in death, has NOTHING to do with healing. That is remaining within the grief cycle. It is not moving on, it's getting stuck. It relates mostly to the bargaining part of grief. "If I do (whatever), then they are still with me". That is NOT healing. It is considered professionally to be very unhealthy.

Also not "every culture" has burial rituals. The Viking ritual consisted of pushing the person out to sea and letting them burn. Naval rites of death still now bury people at sea (no fixed point of burial). There are other cultures, mostly tribal, that once the person is buried you never return to that place unless it is to bury another person. The land is taboo.

So you see it isn't about having a place to grieve... not always. Mostly it was about getting a rotting, disease filled corpse out of the village and away from harm. Hence the taboo's. Marked graves too are a very recent invention in the world of burial.

Lastly, from a grief counselling point of view, grief is selfish. It never has anything to do with the dead person, but with ourselves. It's about what we have lost, what we can not reconnect too. Healing comes from recognising that the connection to the person is gone, but we can reconnect with the memory of that person within our psyche. But mostly it's about realising that they are gone.

To go and perform rituals in the long term at a persons grave because of what you have lost from them passing is not healing, is not moving on, it's becoming stuck in the grief cycle.
Man will believe the impossible, but never the improbable



 


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